[Courses] [Spineful Living, Lesson 4: Saying No!]

[Carla Schroder]

On Thursday 26 April 2007 07:20, Doc Nielsen wrote:
>
> I too have had a hard time saying no to work.
> I think it boils down to my eagerness and willingness to please others.
> I was bullied at school back in the lower grades, pre-teen, and as a
> result, i mostly kept to myself, entertained myself, and didn't
> interact much with the other kids. I didn't have many friends, nor
> many playmates.
> As i grew older, my only friends came from education or work, and were
> more colleagues than friends. We had a common goal, and i was always
> head of my class in tech school, and in IT school too. So i was sought
> after for my knowhow, and i agreed to assist because of my inner need
> to avoid conflicts.

A born computer geek! :) I'll wager a lot of us can relate to this.

>
> Last year i think i said the biggest NO of my life.

>... i asked my boss if i could have a few days off, as part of my
> summer vacation, the week before school. He refused again, because
> that week was his own vacation week, and he couldn't do without.
> So 5 weeks past, and when i returned from school, i asked my boss
> again for my 3 weeks summer vacation, and he agreed to let me take the
> three weeks, provided i came in on thursday and friday during the
> first week. I told him NO.

> ...He objected, but he
> had no valid argument for not letting me take 3 full weeks, so i did.
>
> So i went on my vacation, and when the 30th of october came round, i
> noticed my pay didnt land in my bankaccount.
> Turns out i had been fired, via email, because i refused to work..
> or as he claims: i agreed to work on the two days, and then just didn't
> show.

Grrr.

>
> Needless to say, my union is now filing a suit against him...

Yay! 

Interestingly, a lot of US technical professionals are anti-union because as 
far as I can tell, they're trapped in this weird "rugged individualist" 
philosophy, like they're geek John Waynes or something. When the reality is 
the employer has all the resources and power. (I know, some unions are 
corrupt and evil, but that's a different issue.)
...
>
> Now i'm working as an equal, for a equal, sharing the load.
> My new boss is great at being the admin, while i (as junior admin) do
> the easier tasks and help out with the major tasks.
> In a 4 man IT department, i am now working full time, while covering
> for my boss as he attends a few classes tuesdays and thursdays.
> I am finally respected and appreciated for my skills, and the pay is
> about 50% higher than apprentice pay, while i have fewer hours, and
> less stress.
>
> I think i struck gold. Lets hope it lasts :)
>

Good for you! It's amazing how much long-term pain we will endure in order to 
avoid short-term pain, like standing up to a jerk boss or looking for a 
better job. I'm glad things worked out for you.
-- 
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Carla Schroder
Linux geek and random computer tamer
check out my Linux Cookbook! 
http://www.oreilly.com/catalog/linuxckbk/
best book for sysadmins and power users
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